Archives for posts with tag: fertility medications

This week we have to be at the clinic Monday, Wednesday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Monday, then J’s retrieval next week. I can’t work out or sleep as much because the schedule is crazy and requires me to travel 1/2 hour to the clinic downtown, then an hour back to the west side for work. Work is super busy for both of us and in the meantime I’m in the hiring process for my new job. I not complaining, it’s exciting, but I’ve had my moments of feeling overwhelmed.

The monitoring during egg retrieval keeps track of J’a follicle growth, number of follicles, and estradiol level. Last week her estradiol was 37. Her current level is 380! She has 16 follicles on one ovary today and 14 on the other. One of them was already large and is now 13 mm. Monday the US tech was concerned that with one big follicle the others would stop growing and we’d have to wait a cycle, but today she said the others are growing too, so we’re still in the game.

J had to have the clinic bloodwork, then another blood draw for some tests we had forgotten to get, and tonight is about to get three more needles in the stomach šŸ˜¦ The kitties and I are being very nice to her!


What I want in my life is to be willing to be
Dazzled ā€“ to cast aside the weight of facts and
maybe even to float a little above this difficult world.

– Mary Oliver

It’s been a very, very rough couple of years, and the bittersweet irony got lost sometimes. My biggest fear – emotional and physical abandonment – happened in the worst way. As a psychologist, I deal with my clients’ abandonment every day, and there is no underestimating the depths of despair here. However, I also believe that if you’re hard-wired to be sensitive, if sadness finds you on most days, if you assume you are unlovable and you ask those around you to prove otherwise every day, you will invite abandonment into your life. Did I invite mine?

I truly believe that darkness gives way to even brighter light though, and I’m more ready than ever to move on. I’m excited and strong and things are only going to get better, and that’s what this blog is about.

My partner and I started an adventure in Los Angeles a year ago. We’re a bit more settled now in our new house, new jobs, and new connections! It was the end of a rough era and today marks the beginning of a new one – an era of good fortune and love.

This blog is a place to process my reflections and revelations, and a place to share the great adventures my girlfriend and I are going to have in the year to come! Thank you for reading, and stay posted because we are off to the races!

Here’s to spring, to being open, to learning to trust again, and seeing what amazing things happen in return!