Here I am in labor and delivery, but I’m not in labor.

J and I had a fun weekend with my father, who was visiting from Connecticut. On Saturday we went hiking in Topanga Canyon and got lost. It was 85 degrees and we ended up doing six miles instead of four. I felt like I couldn’t go on due to difficulty breathing, the heat and my protruding stomach, but we eventually made it out, went swimming in Santa Monica and went to a wonderful dinner.

Yesterday I felt really tired. J had to leave for a business trip and we were sad. We talked about how to prepare for later on in the third tri when she’s on a trip – staying near the phone, when she’ll stop going out of town, etc.

After she left I went to the bathroom and felt some gushing blood. I was bleeding bright red. I told my dad we had to go to the hospital and called J on the way. She was already on the airplane and they were announcing that the doors were about to shut. She almost got off but I told her not to, that I’d be fine. She ordered in-flight wifi so we could keep texting. My father and I went to L & D triage and they did an ultrasound, inserted an IV hookup in case I need fluids or blood, and did a pelvic exam. After two hours they admitted me to a room and said they’d be monitoring me for a couple of days. My first thought was that I have to go to work of course, but I got over that. Mostly I was worried that I would go into labor which was terrifying; the baby isn’t ready and we’re not ready.


The doctors said it was likely a placental abruption which can be serious. I spent a lonely and sleepless night in a dark room. I sent my dad home to feed the kitties and get some sleep. Right after he left I did have a good cry. I slept no more than an hour. They hooked me up to ultrasound monitors that keep constant tabs in the baby’s heart rate and breathing, as well as contractions (which I’m not having). I kept bleeding a little with minor cramping but my cervix wasn’t dilated and I wasn’t in labor thank goodness.

I was awake alllllniiiight, 11pm, 1am, 3am, 5am… The night went on and on. I missed J so much and worried about going into labor. I finally slept from 4 to 5am. In the morning I was wheeled on a gurney to radiology and they did vaginal and abdominal ultrasounds. The good news is that I don’t have placenta previa, my placenta has risen to 3.5 cm above the cervix, which is good news for the possibility of a vaginal delivery, the baby’s head is down and my cervix is closed and long.

I had a long day of monitoring, nurses, and ordering fun room service food for breakfast, lunch and dinner. My father came bearing fresh fruit, knitting and phone chargers and spent the whole day in the hospital room with me. We talked to the doctors and everything seems optimistic, but things can change at any time. For now, as long as the bleeding continues to subside, I can go home tomorrow night. I’m going to be considered high risk from here on out and there are going to have to be some lifestyle changes that will be hard for me, like giving up kickboxing and weights and having a much lower stress level at work. They have suggested I stop working but have also said I can work but need to reduce physical and emotional stress. Not an easy task for me but I just want to focus on the baby and becoming a mom. This experience has made things feel very real.

They’ve given me two shots of betamethasone to help Glitter’s lungs develop in case she’s born, one last night and one tonight. Shots in the butt hurt! They were wonderful enough to take me off the monitors tonight and give me an Ambien. I hope sleep is in my near future. Good night.