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I started this blog as a way to document our decision to do reciprocal IVF, and the process, so other lesbians choosing this path could learn about it and I could meet others doing egg sharing. It’s quickly turned into a pregnancy blog! It happened so fast, I just can’t believe it. I feel incredibly lucky and also like I’m living in a dream. I’m so aware of my audience, of the different experiences and paths all of you strong women are going through. I respect and honor all of the joys, sorrows, doubts, and frustrations of every blogger I follow and every blogger who follows this blog.

I want to share our first ultrasound! It was crazy in a good way. We woke up early Saturday morning and rushed to the clinic. We were both exhausted from my insomnia, which keeps both of us up. Our doctor did a vaginal u/s and found a gestational sac and a yolk sac. There was also a tiny flickering heartbeat! 113 bpm. We heard it and saw it strong and adorable on the machine! She said everything looked great and it was the best possible outcome. Most importantly, there was only one! No twins. For a second I was really disappointed but that quickly turned into relief; relief that the baby wouldn’t have the risk that comes with multiples, and relief that I wouldn’t be physically carrying multiples.

We only have one more u/s at the fertility clinic; our doctor said we’ll graduate at 8 weeks. They say the first trimester, but from what I’ve read on other blogs, it’s usually 8 weeks. The doctor also said that prior to the u/s our miscarriage risk was about 50%, but now she guesses it’s down to 20%. I don’t understand this statistics stuff – last weekend when I bled, my mother (who’s a midwife) said the risk was 50%, but the on-call doctor from our clinic said it was “much lower” than that, but it turns out it probably was 50%. Can’t doctors from the same clinic have the same idea about such things?! We don’t even believe any of our clinic’s fertility stats because they haven’t done research on lesbian couples with no history of fertility problems anyway, so who knows.

We spent the morning in bliss, calling our families and emailing them the video J took of the heartbeat. We also got two books – What to Expect, of course, as a daily reference, and The Complete Organic Pregnancy by Deirdre Dolan and Alexandra Zissu. I’m in morning sickness hell. It started at exactly 6 weeks, 1 day. I spent the weekend gagging, not throwing up, unfortunately, eating lots of nasty crackers I’m now sick of, and lying around feeling yucky. I’m glad to have symptoms because I know they’re good signs, but man I’m sore, tired, queasy, dizzy and short of breath!

I’m still adjusting to the new job and haven’t had much time or energy for blogging, but my next post will surely cover it, especially having morning sickness alllllll dayyyyy long when no one around you knows what’s wrong!

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